Freitag, der dreizehnten (Archiv).

~Freitag,  der dreizehnten. Schatten und licht. 05-13-16~

Video by: AnaStasia Andreadou – :Of The Wand & The Moon: ~ Megin Runar

I find my flowers on paths astray
Megin runar on paths well hid and torch lit
So rise snakes of the golden secret gleam
Thou phantoms of the midnight

The darkness sway for my eyes like a moth – a moth
Mysteries subtle and secret – to dim to touch

So rise thou spirits of the midnight gleam
In thy most secret cloaks and signs
Touch the night with your invoking
So raven black at heart
To dark for speech
And hidden from the eye
The glow the ritual the wonder
Solitude loneliness megin runar

The darkness sway for my eyes like a moth – a moth
Mysteries subtle and secret – to dim to touch.

Names with meanings stemming from Proto-Germanic.

Megin: Good,  child of light,  ability,  power.

Runar: Secrets,  military strength and power.

Said track and video describes my true spirit perfectly. This would seem to be a post better suited for Autumn however given the day and my mood as of late I feel it is fitting.

I can recall to my childhood and late night stirring in my heart,  waking up only to sit on the back lawn under the moonlight(Our first home had a huge back lawn with many trees),  I would return to my room before my parents found out I had crept out every night. On other nights I would peer sideways at the shadows in my room,  the shadows which would leave my life entirely in 2009. Mother said maybe when I leave the country these particular shadows will return,  as we share the same experiences to the subtle voices in nature. As for sneaking out at night I can’t even do that now in the cities,  I think you can guess why. Since the last time these Shadows appeared to me,  my life from then onward has become a mundane void,  I could feel in my gut..  something deep inside of me died or was lost as a consequence of not seeking them out.  I was in the woods at that precise moment following a hard time in my life,  rather than follow the shadows I instead went back to the road.. I have been trying desperately to re-connect since,  to no avail.

One winter night over 13 years ago 2002/2003 (Right before I moved out for college),  my mother and I accompanied by our family dog stood frozen on the back porch,  it was close to midwinter thus darker. I felt a presence which made the hairs of my neck literally stand on end,  our dog Murphy as we called him was motionless and silent – not a whimper came out of him. Rather he was staring straight at the dark as if triggered to the presence of an intruder. I asked my mother “Do you feel that”. She replied solemnly – “yes”. It was as if a massive figure stood before us from the darkness beyond where halogen lights lost it’s reach,  the night felt blacker than usual as well as if there were a pull upon me. Of course there was no one else there physically before us. Our trance was broken when my brother came outside and asked what was going on. To which my mother replied,  nothing..   and we walked inside the house and ignored what had just transpired.

I feel our latent intuition,  connection with the hidden voices of nature as with animals is more primitive,  a feature most of domesticated man has lost. On another note,  I was also supposed to die at birth,  for this my mother said I was divine for both as the old ways dictated and that she wished desperately not to lose me having lost another child prior. Take that as how you would like,  however our bond has always been unbreakable despite ills of recent years. I refer to these shadows as to some remnant of the past, “guardians”  ancestors lingering upon my kin,  perhaps the dishonored dead.

On the topic of Morphic resonance I will only briefly hint at this,  although I feel this topic has some relevance thus will be more thoroughly covered in the future in some translation.  All ordered systems,  be it molecular or cellular,  plant or animal,  even inanimate crystal have a collective memory on which each individual draws upon and contributes to. Latent empathy (the ability to read emotion without verbal or outward indication) occurs in groups of individuals who share a close bond i.e. family or a wolf pack.

I am of the Novemberblut season of hunters presiding the season of death,  born under the constellation of Scorpio directly prior to the season of Hel (Autumn/Winter). I am bonded to the bosom my mother,  both my maternal ancestor and the shadowy matron who presides over all. Mother even said that she could feel the matron of death gazing upon her shoulders,  in a figurative sense this is true. I am only alive due to a twist in fate,  had I been born in the wilderness I would have died (Her actual words) hence by natural law I should not be alive in present. Alas I am alive nonetheless naturally bound to darker inclinations.  Longing for eternal winter (death),  chasing shadows and cladding myself in the night.

Ich bin der fernen Sohn die Göttin Hela,  mein Herz für eine Eiszeit sehnt.

I walk a tenuous path between these forces “leben und toten”,  chaotic,  harsh yet adoptable in practice as I have been conditioned to know no other way. No,  I am not suicidal,  haphazard perhaps. More the reason to throw myself into the fray.

Of course we are in the season of rebirth at present,  on a day which celebrates the birth of gods.

Video by: ThuleanPerspective – About Friday 13th (Paganism Part XI)

Note: This is the only video from Thulean Perspective retained in light of his inconsistencies,  it is relevant considering that the Menstrual cycle of a woman lasts nine months as does months the Lunar cycle in its phases. However it should be noted that traditional Europe is primarily of a Solar Emphasis with a much less noted Lunar aspect.

As to everything else,  I am taking a prolonged break from wordpress and internet usage in general in order to jump to the next major creative sector. Rather than squeezing blood from a turnip as I’ve typically done as of late. I want to break into video(a new medium) before I leave the U.S. I am also both mentally and physically preoccupied with equipping myself for leave (Books,  medicine,  survival gear) which surmises all of my energy committed to the present including brief appearances online. Yes,  for certain you will get some glimpse at me beyond the usual anonymity however vague it may be.


The outlander messiah knows not of blood and ice,  they are not wolves!

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s